I hate depression

[dragoness_e]

I get so tired of being depressed all the time.

I don't get stuff done, I feel guilty about it, and then continue to not do stuff.

I get hyper-sensitive about other people's interactions with me, and avoid people because I don't know how to deal with them when I'm depressed, and then get lonely because I never talk to people anymore.

I can't handle disapproval or criticism at all when I'm like this; it makes me just curl up into a ball of misery--even if the other person is wrong and an idiot. (See above paragraph).

My usual consolations seem boring and pointless--I'm just wasting me time doing nothing useful, when I should be doing all that useful stuff I haven't been doing (see paragraph #2).

I don't get enough sleep, which makes me more depressed, so I stay up late because I'm too depressed to end the pointless day by going to bed.

I really hate this shit.

Comments

[hellkitty]

Are you me? Because wow, reading this is like spending time in my own head. :( I wish I had come up with something that worked to offer.

[dragoness_e]

Isn't depression "fun"? Sometimes it's hard to remember it's the fucked-up chemicals in one's brain talking, not reality.

I'm feeling better now--helps to get out in the sun and have some of the logjams of "pending stuff" break loose. I suspect I am very vulnerable to SAD, even in the summer, because I spend so much time indoors at work, at my hobbies...